Have you ever been at a place in your life where you didn’t know what to do next? If you’re not a planner or someone who likes to have a schedule or at least a “to do” list, this might be somewhat hard to understand but follow me here…
Recently I have been out of sorts, mind wandering, not knowing what the next move was supposed to be. I was simply getting by each day with no clear direction as to what road to travel or even if there was going to be a road around the next bend. I waited, often confused and overwhelmed that I didn’t have more of a clue that I do.
Feeling like I was out of place almost everywhere I went, no matter who I was with, yearning for that comfort that I typically always had. I wasn’t unhappy, just *blah* and not really even sure why.
Aside from making better food choices, I started exercising with my family outside. We went for walks, hikes and bike rides nearly every day lately and boy, did that feel better!
Then, as if someone hit me with a brick, a conversation with my husband made it all come together. Ironically, we were feeling somewhat of the same way! Although he doesn’t have the female hormones that make my brain somewhat questionable (yes, I will admit that!), he did feel kind of complacent and wondered what is next.
Ever since we met, we dreamed together, talked about our future and up until recently, had goals and a list of things we needed to do in order to reach those goals. Although we haven’t reached them all, we are well on our way and fairly confident that what we’re doing, if we keep on keeping on, we’ll accomplish each of them right on time — God’s time.
That brings me to THE conversation…
What do we want? Why don’t we have clear direction? What are we working so hard for every day? It’s not just to work so what is it that we’re working hard to achieve? For either of us, it’s not success. We could care less if our names are in lights as long as we make a difference right where we’re at.
Then there’s the question of finances. If we’re on the right path, saving and spending wisely, what is it that we’re going to do later?
We used to dream — a LOT! It’s not that we aren’t dreaming, we just don’t know what we’re dreaming about at the moment. We’re going through the day to day, knowing that we’d like to have property, that we want to be further in the country, have cows, chickens and more dogs but what else? For either of us, it doesn’t just have a happy ending in the grand scheme of things.
When we retire, or before that if we can help it, we want all of these things but there needs to be a purpose. WE need to serve a purpose. That’s where we feel that things have changed lately. We know that we want our resources to help others and that, once we have this dream home on our dream property, that it will serve a purpose to help others but we just aren’t sure in what way. We don’t know where to look or, for that matter, where to start.
That’s when he said it…those words that I didn’t realize I would dread.
“Maybe God has us here because he wants us to rest.”
“Rest?” I said. “Neither one of us likes to rest.”
He knows as well as I do that even on the days we plan to do nothing, we end up doing things that need to be done. It’s just how we are. We can’t sit still. I can think of only a handful of days in the 6+ years that we’ve known each other that we have actually sat down and watched tv or movies all day. We just don’t stop and that’s all for good reason. As much as we don’t like being busy, we do. We’re go-getters and I’m pretty sure that’s how God intended it to be.
If we want something, we work for it – or – we think about it and decide if it’s really a want, a need or something that eventually we’ll get over and wish we wouldn’t have bought. We analyze only because we want to be sure that we use our resources wisely. But most importantly, we have been in a place where what we are doing or planning to do is making a difference.
The unclear picture for our future as to what we’re working for and why is driving us both crazy. But here’s the deal — maybe he’s right — he probably IS right.
We work so hard all the time for something that God just wants us to take some time to just be right where we are. He wants us to chill out and be OK doing so. It’s a lesson of sorts.
In the meantime, while we are trying to find out what’s next, we connect with one another by simply knowing we’re on the same page, incorporating more prayer and being open to what God reveals to us.
When I searched the word “comfortable” of course a lot of things came up but a portion of this one struck me:
“However, sometimes comfort can be a stumbling block. Sometimes comfort can rob us of our strength and dependence on God. Think of a man who is so comfortable in his life with so few problems that he doesn’t do much of anything let alone worry about anything. He relaxes and enjoys life. He also becomes weak and dependent upon his routine and life. So too the Christian who is very comfortable in his life, can also become weak and dependent upon the securities of life instead of the Lord. There is nothing wrong with being comfortable, unless that comfort makes us depend on God less and cause us to become complacent about the lost around us.”
So this is where we are. We may not be able to identify with the entire piece, but we are here, in this very paragraph, praying that God will show us what we can do with our future that will bring about change in others by allowing us to use our gifts as a blessing.
We really want to help people.
We both have unique skills in which to do so.
We have wordly dreams that we fully believe can play into the idea of helping others.
So what’s next? Do we rest where we’re at? Pray for direction and a clear mind?
The end of that same devotional that I read summed up some ways that just might help. I’m sharing them with you because I don’t doubt that there are others out there feeling the same way. As Christians, we aren’t supposed to simply feel comfortable for long periods of time. We are supposed to step out of our proverbial box and do something — daily.
“…. pray to the Lord and ask Him to reveal your sins to you. Confess them and do your best to repent as you continue to rely on His grace. Second, read your Bible regularly and ask the Lord to apply to your heart what you read. Third, ask God to put a desire on your heart that is in accordance with your spiritual giftings so that you may not only grow and edify the body of Christ, but also to reach out to the lost. If you don’t know what your spiritual gifts are, that’s okay. God will show you. Fourth, don’t be afraid to take risks for the Lord. Don’t be afraid to become a little un-comfortable. Tithe. Pray. Intercede. Read the Word. Confess your sins. Speak the gospel.
Remember, our life is not about our comforts. It is about loving God, loving others, and spreading the word of God.”
I think the author hit the nail on the head for me when he got to the third part of his suggested prayer. I know you may not be in the same spot as we are, but I guarantee we could all use a little prayer time to determine what it is that God wants us to do. We sometimes focus so much on what we want that we forget to bring God into our dreams.
After all, He should be in the driver’s seat, don’t you think?
Next time you pray, ask God what He wants you to do then be patient and wait expectantly. Sometimes He reveals a plan that seems far out of reach but I guarantee, whatever it is, if God is your driver, then you’ll always be right on track!